How 1 Simple Question Altered the Course of My Relationships Forever

A startling epiphany that came at exactly the right time

Photo by Nick Fewings on Unsplash

I wanted to believe that I was the only one he could really love, because I was the only one who truly “got” him.

I wore his letterman’s jacket for six rocky months of my junior year, which is practically like a first marriage in high school. He was my first date, my first real kiss, my first real boyfriend. We clashed frequently, mostly because when I needed him to be there for me, he would retreat.

It was a perfectly normal, defensive response from a teenage girl to the guy who was breaking up with her.

Shortly before our six-month anniversary, it happened. He cornered me in the hallway after school, right outside the door of the National Honors Society meeting I was about to attend. (Confession: I wasn’t just a band nerd. I was a nerd-nerd.)

I’d already had my taste of freedom, and I didn’t trust his feelings for me anymore.

Afterward, I told my friends what had happened and they rallied around me (they didn’t like him either). They reminded me that I was now free, and I could “play the field.” I wasn’t ready for that yet, but I appreciated the sentiment.

Musings on motherhood, writing, life, and relationships– and the struggle to stay sane through it all.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store