It’s also important for those of us who speak in the 6th Love Language to ask for that time and distance. Often our partners simply don’t realize it’s what we need. It took me years to realize that whenever I got quiet and talked less my husband (an extrovert) assumed I was upset about something or mad at him.
When I do start feeling anxious and I need time and space, my husband seems to really appreciate it (and give me more distance) when I tell him, “Hey, I’m kind of stressed out and everything feels like too much right now. It’s not your fault, and I’m not mad at you, but I could use your help. I mostly just need to be alone, to have some quiet time. Can you help me with that?”
I know my husband is THRILLED when he can do something to help me out, and after an hour, a day, a week, I’m back to normal again. And, of course, I always try to express my love to him for giving me that time to recuperate.
I’ve found that just being open and honest with my kids when I need space really helps too. It’s hard being an introvert when you’re a mother!
Here’s the story I wrote about my experience with asking my kids to help me cope with my anxiety:
